Meh

So apparently my boss has taken a liking to me, he just has a really strange way of showing it. This is the same boss that flambeed me in front of the whole office. I hate it when this happens, when I am sure someone dislikes me, they shock the shit out of me and it turns out it is the total opposite. I take things way too personally, I just do. I feel like words and language are a weapon at times because you can really screw up a person's whole day if you say the wrong thing - or maybe you intentionally said those things to hurt someone. Words and speech are dangerous - infectious - like a disease. That's why I like to use them to describe how I am feeling or to annoy other people. I wrote an article about how I disliked irresponsible motorcyclists and I got a foul response about it - the thing is it is obvious that the idiot that responded didn't read the whole article because I lay out exact why I am upset with motorcyclists and bicyclists for that matter. The point is, I affected that person mentally with something I wrote and placed on the Internet. I didn't even have to force this person to read it, they found it. Words are a dangerous thing. Now place the power language and speech into a untouchable rich asshole and there you have it - my boss. He is pleasant sometimes, but now I am afraid to make eye contact with him, because I don't want him to yell at me again.

I just wanted to get this off my chest.

I am at a loss again, I am overwhelmed with a lot of what is going on right now. I am pretty much at the point where I don't even want to show up to work anymore. I'm tired of work. I have a few side projects going on right now, but I haven't had any significant time to work on any of it yet.

Work Work

You ever go to work and just sit there and don't want to do jack shit? I am not motivated to do anything right now, which sucks because I do have work I need to do. I am just not interested in what I am working on at the moment it is painfully boring. To make matters worse I don't know when to expect new projects to come my way because my boss doesn't explain anything to me properly. He just puts a bunch of fucking words on a page broken up by newlines and tells me to build it. His design documents are always pretty much a single page or an excel sheet mock up which sucks. He gives me zero background on what or why I am doing this, he just sets down his vague idea and tells me to "do it and do it right".

Very motivating. Right now I need a goddamn bonus. Another 10K and a raise is in order damn it.

I want to start writing one of my three books.

Banter

I want a dual band hand held. I am thinking Yaesu, just for convenience. I also want a bike, but not a machine welded department store bike, but a slightly high end touring bike. Not necessarily racing bike, but definitely not a damn mountain bike.

I like bicycles, I always have and I want to get that exhilaration of being on a bike back. Flying long distances and going so fast you feel like your heart is going to explode. Fun shit. It has been an insanely long time since I have ridden a bike.