Well... like every time I feel the slight bit depressed I look at my money to make me feel better and I think about the future and how much money I will have in the future if i can keep increasing my savings. I am worried about investments, because as much as I wanted to resist believing it, your savings - money you save in a savings account - does not adjust with recession/inflation. Therefore the money you save now, will not be as powerful later because our dollar's value jumps all over the place. Fun fun fun. The other thing I have learned is that I suck at investing my money. I have tried purchasing equities and other securities and I have lost about 50-70% of my initial investment on all of the stocks I have chosen. I purchased a CD and I made $0 on it. I purchased a Bond from the government and I made $0 dollars on it. I tried... I really tried to understand how this shit works and I came to the realization that if you want to make money in the stock market or in investments you either have to pay attention to your fucking money full time or you need to hire someone to do it for you. It is a dangerous game.
This whole scare with my wife possibly getting laid off has scared me again, it brought me back to the time I was laid off. Getting laid off is one of the most horrible feelings ever especially if you don't see it coming. Well she was lucky and she was spared. We dodged that bullet - but I keep wondering, "What if she did get laid off? Then what?" I would carry the both of us, but I don't know how long I could do that for... I think I make enough to cover both of our expenses, but I am not so sure about that so I have decided in order to thwart this fear we need to sit down and plan this out just in case.
Well anyhow - going back to my pipe dream - I would like one day to not have to worry about money. Retirement really is my main focus and goal. I am just not sure though with the idea of having a family, one or two children. I don't know if I want to do that.
I got bigger problems right now, I was just called and told the house I am trying to get an offer on requires a 30% down payment... bad times man. The fucking place looks like a town home. Turns out it is a condominium association instead even though it isn't a high rise. Fuck me. Finding a home right now is very difficult and expensive. Finding a place where you can just put down 5% is retardedly difficult. This is the kind of stress I don't want right now, why can't buying a home be like buying a fucking car. You go in, you negotiate all day and then you come out with a car or you don't. Getting a home is too complicated right now. I mean I don't want to trivialize the housing bubble, but that was more of a lender issue than the buying issue. The buying issue was just as long back then as it is now, except lenders were being shit bags and giving people who couldn't afford certain loans their loans just so they could make more money. Fucking scum bags. Screws honest people like myself and people who are honestly paying down their goddamn mortgage.
... whatever I guess I will just press forward. I need a fucking place to live goddamn it.
No comments:
Post a Comment